It was at my lowest point that I reminded myself that I have the ability to make another choice. As difficult as it was. It helped to remind myself of my value and of my talents. I have a good heart. An intelligent mind. A fit and healthy body. I am a good mom. A good writer. I have always been writer. I have written kids books. I could write a novel, a damn good one at that. Daily I pumped myself up, telling myself that I am a great writer and a great mom and that I could do this. It’s going to happen. And I am pleased to say that it did. But it wasn’t easy! And at the time I was beyond scared to consider going out on my own without a dime to my name. But I wanted more and somehow I just knew that things would work out.
The times they are a changing.
When I signed those final papers a proverbial weight lifted from my petite frame and I was free. It was a very magical time. I went to movies, concerts, I even signed up for 5k running event where I ran
through a field of lavender.
I went to Disneyland with my parents and kids. I went to the beach and I was healed and very happy for the first time in a very long time. Every day was like my birthday. I was reborn. Each day I began my day by writing in my gratitude journal. I wrote ten things that I was grateful for and why. It feels amazing to do this. And I highly recommend it! Do it when you’re feeling down to remind yourself of all the great things that are going on and take your focus off the pain. Or even better, just do it when you’re feeling happy to reinforce more feel good.
Hopefully, I am not getting too over the top here. And I’ll be the first to tell you that not every day was ideal, after all, this is life. We all have ups and downs. To quote Johnny Depp, “The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem.”
I am happy. I am a writer. I am a good Mom. I am in love. I am me.