This Morning I Woke Up on the news

Excitement provoked me to wake way before my alarm even had a chance. The early morning blackness was still settled and camped out in my room. Looking at the time, I saw that is was 3:33. OK, so I was a little keyed up and couldn't sleep. No biggie. I made some coffee. Lots of coffee. Played some Neko Case tunes, and soaked in a tub full of bubbles. All the while I practiced what I wanted to say. I've never been on TV before. The thought both terrified me and thrilled me. What an honor and a blessing.  Although I was excited, my stomach protested; it twisted and turned at the thought. I blocked out any negative, 'what if's' thoughts, and replaced them with, you can do this. You can do this. You can do this. 

Believe you can and you're half way there.

This is what you're meant to do.

         I got out of the tub and got dressed in what I feel like was a Kate Middleton inspired ensemble. My red heels clicked down the hall and into my kitchen. Surprise was evident on my face when I saw my oldest son, Brayden, sitting at the table sipping some coffee. By this time, it was 4:45 am. Usually I see him moments before he leaves for school, at about 7:45. 

         

          "Hey, B," I called out. "What are you doing up?"

          His big brown eyes met mine and with a shrug, he said, "Good morning. Ready to go on the news?"

         I laughed and smiled and said, "Yes. Yes I am." 

         From there, I rehearsed what I wanted to say about my book as Brayden patiently listened and nodded along. It felt really good to see that he was proud of me, enough so that he even got up to see me before I headed out. As I'm cheerfully talking  about my beloved book and characters, I look up and see my love, Troy, coming down the hall. His eyes are squinting and tired. Its now 5:00, so no wonder. But he is smiling my favorite smile! Giving me more confidence. More support. More encouragement. I want to make him proud. Surprise was also evident on his face when he saw that I was actually animated and smiling and laughing. And so early in the morning!

      

 I not a morning person. 

But today, I was.

   

         It was still dusk when we arrived at the station. We were fifteen minutes early. The sky was purple. The moon was waning and half full. A peacefulness settled over me. I hopped out of our truck and my heels caught a little on the pavement, but Troy caught me and I steadied myself. As I clutched my good luck heart shaped necklace, I headed into the station. I never do anything important without Troy and my good luck necklace glocket. It has pretty gem stones inside, my birthstone, Troy's, my kids, and the word BELIEVE. 

        After we found our way into where the filming was already taking place, I was surprised to see behind the scenes of a program I've watched many times from my living room. It was very different than watching it on TV, but also kind of similar. Their voices were familiar  As was their faces.  Quickly, we were welcomed and made to feel at home. The set was small and quaint, and it comforted me like a nice cup of coffee and my favorite cream cardigan. It didn't take long for me to realize that the show was like a well oiled machine and news and information was flowing from its pores. And it wouldn't be what it is without all great the people involved. The anchors. The cameramen. The audience. And well, me, at least for the day. 

        When it was my turn to sit on the stand next to the very kind, Logan Mcdougal, the channel six news co-anchor, it didn't feel scary at all. It was a great feeling. Almost as good as being in Troy's arms. But only because when I looked over, I saw him smiling at me. He believed in me. This gave me the courage and confidence to speak on air. And to believe in myself.  Eloquently I conversed about something very dear to me, my novel, This Morning I Woke Up Dead. I am humbled and proud to say, that it went very well. It was an amazing experience, and if you ever get the chance to go on TV, do it! 

Just believe you can. 

Me on KPVI news channel six NBC talking about my book

All about me

My name is Mindy Rae Boyer Larson. I am a thirty six year old writer and a mother to four great kids. I am a big sister to three great brothers. I am daughter. I’ve recently found the love of my life. I am a runner. A baker. A lover. A sister. A friend.

 I have an amazing life.

Some of the highlights and things that stick out as I look back at my life evokes many emotions: happiness, longing, sadness, pain, pleasure. The list could go on. But I really don’t want to dwell on the past. I am so happy in my day to day life that and living in the moment that I rarely want to think about the past at all, but I am who I am today because of everything.

I am not perfect. I am human and I didn’t always make the best choices. Growing up, I was the cliché bad girl. I skipped a lot of school; I hung out with the cool kids and partied. I was pregnant at sixteen. I broke my parents’ hearts but I rose to the occasion. There was no choice. I was going to keep my baby. I loved my son more than anything. I wanted to be the best mom possible. Knowing my schooling would play a role in this; I continued my education. I graduated on time and with my class in 1995. Six months later I was given another choice, and wanting to do what I felt was right at the time, I married my high school boyfriend. He’s not the biological father of my son but raised as his own. I was eighteen. He was twenty.

Being a wife and a mother, forced me into growing up even more so. We were young. We weren’t ready to be married. Early on I was unhappy. He was unhappy. We weren’t a good match. And as a result, our four children suffered. We tried our best and stuck it out until December of last year, 2012. I made the decision of parting ways and divorcing. I wanted to show my kids that I could be a happy, content, and a fulfilled parent. My hopes were that someday they would be able to see a healthy and loving example of how adults could exist together. The very thought gave drove me through difficult times. Parting ways meant I was giving up the security of being married to a successful and wealthy man. I remember even asking myself, 'what are you thinking? You have no job. No job skills. You’re just a stay at home mom for crying out loud! You’re stuck, baby.'

 It was at my lowest point that I reminded myself that I have the ability to make another choice. As difficult as it was. It helped to remind myself of my value and of my talents. I have a good heart. An intelligent mind. A fit and healthy body. I am a good mom. A good writer. I have always been writer. I have written kids books. I could write a novel, a damn good one at that. Daily I pumped myself up, telling myself that I am a great writer and a great mom and that I could do this. It’s going to happen. And I am pleased to say that it did. But it wasn’t easy! And at the time I was beyond scared to consider going out on my own without a dime to my name. But I wanted more and somehow I just knew that things would work out.

                                           

                                           The times they are a changing.

When I signed those final papers a proverbial weight lifted from my petite frame and I was free. It was a very magical time. I went to movies, concerts, I even signed up for 5k running event where I ran 
 through a field of lavender.















I went to Disneyland with my parents and kids. I went to the beach and I was healed and very happy for the first time in a very long time. Every day was like my birthday. I was reborn. Each day I began my day by writing in my gratitude journal. I wrote ten things that I was grateful for and why. It feels amazing to do this. And I highly recommend it! Do it when you’re feeling down to remind yourself of all the great things that are going on and take your focus off the pain.  Or even better, just do it when you’re feeling happy to reinforce more feel good.
 

                                          Just do it. 

Hopefully, I am not getting too over the top here. And I’ll be the first to tell you that not every day was ideal, after all, this is life. We all have ups and downs. To quote Johnny Depp, “The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem.”

In the beginning days when my kids were with their dad I missed them like missing a limb. My hear hurt. I had such anxiety that I literally shook. OK so maybe part of it was because of my coffee addiction. Nothing beats a cup of coffee, a good book, and a closet full of shoes and clothes. Nonetheless I powered through the tough times. Whenever the kids were at their dads, I did things for me. I wrote a lot. I gave myself facials and pedicures. I worked out like crazy. I was in the best shape of my life. Wanting to continue my new positive lifestyle, I quickly abandoned the novel I had been working on, and I began a new novel, This Morning I Woke Up Dead

If you haven't already, check out my facebook page This Morning I Woke Up Dead and  Pinterest Mindy Larson and goodreads.com

In July of 2012, I met the love of my life, Troy Gilbert. We cook together. We clean together. We workout together. We’ve travel. We’ve been to California, Utah, Las Vegas, Arizona, and Wyoming and even have plans to go all over the world. We laugh every day. We are a wonderful team in this crazy thing called life. He makes me feel cherished and special. He has single handedly renewed my faith in love. And by feeling these wonderful magical things I was able to create Hadley and Dominic’s love story in, This Morning I Woke Up Dead.

                             
                 I am happy. I am a writer. I am a good Mom. I am in love. I am me.